October 15th

As I sit here and begin to type, my eyes are filled with tears.....

It has been a very emotional day. October 15th is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day - a day to honour and remember all the children we hold in our hearts instead of our arms.

Losing a child is one of the most painful experiences you can ever have. It is different to losing a partner or parent or someone who has lived a long fulfilling life. When you lose a child during pregnancy you lose all hope for the future, you have no memories, no smiles, no milestones just endless questions about what could of been. You don't get to see your child grow, play, talk or smile.

When we lost Yasminah, I remember wanting to hold her forever. I couldn't stop staring at her face, taking in all of her features, soaking up her sweet baby smell. I remember kissing her sweet cheeks and little button nose. I whispered in her ear how much I loved her and would always miss her before heartbreakingly handing her over to my midwife, never to see or hold her again.

These are the only words I can find today to express what it means to lose a child and how heartbreaking it is that this sadly happens every day. 1 in 4 families experience the loss of a child.

Right now there is a woman being told she has miscarried, that there is no heartbeat

Right now a woman has just had her waters break, her child will be born premature only to live a few minutes, hours or days

Right now a family has made the heartbreaking decision to turn off life support and say goodbye to their child

Right now a family has been told their long awaited child isn't 'compatible with life'

Right now a woman is giving birth, but her child wont ever open their eyes or cry, this child will be born sleeping, but still born
Right now a parent is wondering why their child hasn't woken for a feed, only to discover they have passed away suddenly and unexpectedly in their sleep
Right now a child is losing a battle against a fatal congenital abnormality or disease

Right now a mother is crying uncontrollably as she misses her baby.

October 15th Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day......will you remember?

My thoughts and prayers are with you all for a gentle day/evening. My candles have been burning since 7pm tonight in memory of Yasminah and all the beautiful angels missed by so many.